News & Views Monday, October 15, 2018

A Sure Cure for Inflation (Egos that is) Wednesday, August 14, 2013

It’s the final dress rehearsal of the Noname Symphony Orchestra before their two week American tour.  The conductor complains of chest pains before taking the podium and then collapses backstage. An ambulance is called and the paramedics say that the conductor should pull through, but he will be out of commission for several weeks.

As they rush him to the hospital, the agitated orchestra personnel manager takes the podium and asks if any of the orchestra members feel capable of conducting the rehearsal.  A fellow at the back of the second violins, who has experience as a community orchestra conductor, raises his hand and is given the job of leading the orchestra through their concert program.  He does so well, that the powers that be ask him to conduct all the concerts on the tour, to which he graciously agrees.

The lack of their normal maestro is played down, so there are no huge expectations and the two week concert tour ends up being a smashing success.  The orchestra was well received and they played extremely well, so everyone was happy.  The maestro, now recovered from his rather mild heart attack, was pleased that everything worked out well.  At the first rehearsal after the tour, he was back on the podium to begin working on new repertoire for the next concert.

The violinist who had conducted the concert tour took his normal seat at the back of the second violins.  His stand partner looked at him strangely and said, “Where in the heck have you been?”

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